Handy Hints for Demo Submitters

Hey pals, here’s a couple of handy hints for sending labels demos.
1. Don’t spend $40 to send a typewriter so we know you’re “original and authentic.” Now we just have to get rid of a fucking typewriter, and you’re out $40.
2. When you include a letter (which you should) don’t note that you have “120 songs written and ready to be recorded.” You want us to sign you to a 10 record deal then? Or do you just write a bunch of really lackluster songs?
3. Write your band’s contact info ON the cd face. Those letters you send? Yeah, they get thrown away pretty fast, and we might not get to the demo for weeks (read: years).
4. If you include press quotes or clips, make sure they’re not from, like, “stevelikesmusic.blogspot.tumblr.twitter.com” - real reputable source, dudes…esp. when the quotes aren’t even that good. Who cares if “this record was a mildly pleasant listening experience.” If that’s your best foot being put forward, I’d hate to see how you’d actually deliver if we asked you to do anything.
Tons more label whining to come, I’m sure. That’s just what’s on the top of my head at this second.
Oh, and don’t call us. We’ll call you.